This time around, it is Hillary who is fucking up the rotation. If there was ever more a tenacious, stubborn, hang-in-there-while-the-chips
So deep, in fact, that I was willing to ignore the warning signs that would mark the beginning of her campaign's end. Nothing was going to get in my candidate's way. Not the exclusion of Florida and Michigan by the DNC, not her 10-state losing streak, not even her ridiculously nascent jabs at "always having to go first" during national debates. But the day that I read about her $5 million personal contribution to her own campaign, was when I got the distinct feeling that, in Smokey's parlance, shit be goin' down.
Shit is going down, and in a big way. When you have to fire your campaign manager midway through a very crucial race, because your coffers are hemorrhaging money - the words "JOHN SNOW" should start flashing in big, red, neon letters. Sound familiar? Hillary is doing in a microcosm, what Bush has been doing throughout his tenure: desperately salvaging her ailing campaign, by shooting into her own rank and file. If you're a Harry Potter geek like me, this is part where Harry finds out that he and Voldemort (Bush, natch) aren't as dissimilar as they think are. Both share a stubborn, systematic refusal to acknowledge inadequacies within their own shop. Both promote nepotism by delegating hands-on operations to their trusted, and untried, cronies. Both have lost substantial goodwill and political capital as a result.
It is time for we Democrats to take a long, hard look at our options. Is it mathematically possible for Hillary to pull ahead of Obama? Probably not. In order for her to clinch the nomination, she needs to lock up at least 60% of all the remaining votes in the last 10 states. Hillary's Big, Fat Anticharisma will unfortunately prevent this from happening. And that's the thing about Americans. When faced with a choice between an unlikeable, but supremely qualified candidate, and the guy that you can have beer and pizza with, we will always pick the second .
So, my friends, after much agonizing thought, I am jumping on the Obama bandwagon. It will be a bumpy ride. Nothing irritates me more than a lemming, and The Cult of Obama is chock full of them. But I am resolute. I will ignore the rants of loud-mouthed, slogan-spouting "Yes We Can"-ers. I will send Obama's nth You Tube video to my spam folder. I will resist the urge to punch the self-righteous Gap storegirl who likens Obama to "like, the next Martin Luther King, Jr." While the thought of having a first-term senator at the helm of our great nation scares me, the threat of another geriatric, war-mongering, Republican nut-job like McCain gives me instant explosive diarrhea. The longer this race drags on, the more likely we'll be stuck with more bloody years in Iraq. Hey, maybe a 100!
It's been great hanging with you, Hillary. I know that certain officers at the DNC love you. But sometimes, there's just not enough beer and weed to go around. Maybe in 2012. Time for you to puff, puff, and GIVE.
Excellent piece. Completely agree. And the writer is hot!
That's a great piece.. Sorry we have to take you kicking and screaming. BTW - Can you give me a little for my cataracts.
Can't say I agree. Still sticking with Hill.